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TV shows and movies are devoted to the spring formal dance. Magazines supply dress choices and other planning tips for the special night.
Hundreds of dollars are spent on the perfect gown — and that doesn’t include the shoes, makeup, hair and accessories.
Corsages and boutonnieres are pinned, limousines rented, expensive dinners eaten.
It is easy to see prom has become more than just a high school dance.
But even as prom continues to grow, the decisions teens can face on that “special” night remain much the same.
What if the party I attend has alcohol?
Should I have sex if my date wants me to?
“Prom night is filled with milestones and land mines,” said Courtney Macavinta, co-author of “RESPECT: A Girl’s Guide to Getting Respect and Dealing When Your Line Is Crossed,” who also runs respectrx.com, a news and advice Web site for teens and parents.
Unofficial pre-prom and post-prom parties are numerous, Macavinta noted, and many teens view the night as the “ideal” time to have their first sexual experience.
Just the cost involved with the evening can give teens anxiety, Macavinta said. For many, a “Hollywood red carpet” is simply too expensive and that can create “a lot of pressure that can affect how you feel about yourself,” she said.
To make prom — and other more common events — easier, teens should focus on being themselves, Macavinta said.
“Getting glammed up and having fun” is important, Macavinta said, but it shouldn’t involve making choices you wouldn’t make another day.
Macavinta recommends setting boundaries before heading off to the dance.
Set goals and a value system for yourself. Decide what your boundaries are regarding drinking alcohol or smoking.
“Have a line already in your mind, and know you are not going to cross it,” she said.
Also ask yourself whether you plan to lie to your parents about any of your prom activities, Macavinta said, adding, “Do you really want to take that risk?”
She recommends being honest with your date ahead of time about expectations for the evening, such as whether you’re not ready for kissing or sex or anything in between.
“The big thing I like to tell girls about sex is no one can pressure you to have sex — especially by a date on the calendar, and that includes prom,” Macavinta said. “You shouldn’t have to consummate your relationship to go to prom.”
Should a sticky situation arise, Macavinta recommends trusting and listening to your instincts.
“After all, the point of prom is to have fun. It shouldn’t be filled with these land mines,” Macavinta said. “You should have fun with your friends based on who you really are.”
If you need to escape a situation, have a cell phone and call home, tell a chaperone or go to the hotel front desk.
Parents can reinforce this by reassuring their children they won’t be in trouble if they call.
“Parents really want to support kids and help them make good decisions,” Macavinta said.
Post-prom carnival will be at La Crosse Center
When the main prom event ends, kids won’t have to go home right away thanks to Midnight Carnival, a post-prom event.
The late-night party was started by parents of high school students more than 10 years ago to provide a place to go after prom to enjoy food and entertainment.
This year’s menu includes pizza, vegetables, fruit, sweets, soda and water. Entertainment will include carnival games, a caricature artist, photos, school vs. school tug-o-war, disc jockey with karaoke, Monster Trikes, Monkey Motion Bungee Jumper, Climbing Wall, Titanic Thrill Slide, Jurassic Survivor Maze and the Cash Cube, from which door prize money will be given out every hour.
Other prizes include a home theater system, DVD player and television set.
Students must be a junior or senior of Onalaska, Central, Logan or Aquinas high schools, or be the date of a junior or senior from one of those schools to attend. Students do not have to attend their school proms to come to Midnight Carnival.
IF YOU GO
What: Midnight Carnival post-prom event
Where: La Crosse Center
When: Midnight Saturday, May 6, to
4 a.m. Sunday, May 7
Who: Aquinas, Central, Logan and Aquinas high school juniors and seniors and their dates.
Tickets: $6 per ticket, available at the schools.
Autumn Grooms can be reached at agrooms@lacrossetribune.com or (608) 791-8424.
