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Looking at my body, you see a story of pain; an attempt to escape from the life I was living. Small circular scars on my arms replaced the constant teasing stemming from an act of pure stupidity in the seventh grade. A cross covers my entire shoulder blade showing the embodiment of my drug abuse, where the melting of my skin took the pain away. Why would a person think inflicting pain on his/her self is an acceptable solution to hide the pain inside? How could dragging a razor across your wrist bring anyone to a state of mind more appealing than life as we know it? Scars are a constant reminder of hard times, but for many teenagers these scars are a source of strength, remembering what they have overcome.
What is violence from the perspective of self-mutilation? Is it blood pouring from your body, or is it constant self-hatred that rips you apart every day you are alive? Cutters don’t feel the razor, and to them it doesn’t matter how deep they cut. Their mind is so battered that the pain brings a sense of soothing, and then it becomes an addiction. Many would say there is no physical violence compared to the violence one may feel inside.
The life that we live is extremely unforgiving from emotional abuse caused by our family or friends to simply a lack of acceptance brought on by our peers. When you look at a young adult that cuts or self-mutilates his or herself, look at the world through their eyes. These people are often in the most vulnerable state of mind they will experience in their lifetime. Other children often see this weakness and thrive off it. When you are alone and the only outside involvement you encounter brings no joy but more pain, what solutions can you find?
Many people are bewildered by cutters. Although suicidal behavior has been around a long time, cutting is a new phenomenon. Older generations don’t know what to think of a younger generation who inflicts such obvious pain on themselves in order to escape pain. Perhaps parents and adults do not need to understand a cutter’s decision to cut, but they do need to recognize the problem that is inside that teenager pouring out in drops of blood. If you do not, eventually a .45 caliber handgun will replace the razor. It doesn’t matter what race, sex, ethnic group, or social class you belong to, pain is often the only solution one can find.
Open your eyes, and see that this is a real issue. Don’t be afraid to try to help; you could save that person’s life. People with this problem need to know they are not alone, and they need to be strong and strive for some type of goal. Many times the issues can be resolved by simply knowing that someone truly cares for them. Remind them that the pain will not go away by cutting. Sure, cutting redirects attention away from the pain, and it temporarily subsides, but it will be right back the first time even a small crisis arises. Don’t shelter yourself from the real issue, but fight to stop this violence from becoming the only outlet for so many teenagers.
If you know a cutter, reach out to them, because if you do not, you consciously make the decision to sit back and watch the behavior continue. Comfortably numb is a scary thought, but I can guarantee you that physical pain is the one thing teens are finding to finally relieve the pain they feel inside. People need to have open minds and open hearts. People need to be more accepting of people who are not what they may consider “normal.” Basically, we all need to just try to be more positive than negative and seriously think about our criticism and ridicule of others.
I confront this violence by bringing it out of the shadows. Teens believe the cutting and drug abuse are their only remedies for their insecurities. I have to be a voice because I have struggled through the pain inside and out. With the help of others, my past has become my past, and each day I strive to be stronger and more positive about my future. I know the pain, yet I have healed. Today, it is my responsibility to bear my scars.
